Thursday, January 29, 2009

Weight loss/gain and being happy

Today I was reading http://smartstrongsexy.blogspot.com about her concerns with her weight and body and it really made me think. I have been saying I've embraced my "fatness" for the past 4 months but honestly I haven't. I've been hiding my "healthy" eating habits from my guy and family just to loss a few pounds without getting grief since I did say I was happy with my look. I have lost a few inches and went down a pant size almost 2; I'm pretty excited about this but I think it's time I come clean with the rest of the world. I am NOT happy being my current size!

I have always been little but after a car accident in 2003 or was it 2004, I gained about 40 pounds; this was due to the fact I couldn't walk. I was either in a "walking" boot or on crutches for the entire time; this meant NO working out. I had 2 surgeries which left me home bound for 6 to 8 weeks at a time; during this time I learned to like food. Ok, call me crazy but I never really liked the taste of food, almost all food; yes I would eat but I could seriously go days with nothing but a few crackers and be fine (or so I thought). Besides not being able to work out, I turned 30 during this time frame. Now I never believed the hype of "once you turn 30, you will not be able to lose weight like you did when you were in your 20's"; I am now a believer! Why is this? Does our body have some crazy internal clock and we only have a limited amount of years to burn a million calories by breathing?

I have been motivated by my best friend to get healthy the smart way; exercise and healthy eating. I have watched her struggle with her weight for the past few years only to gain it all back after the "special occasion" she lost it for. I want EVERY day to be my special occasion! I'm not going to track my progress or stress out losing pounds. Seeing no or slow results is like torture to me; instead I'm going to continue not stepping on a scale and once a month will see if I can fit into my favorite jeans (size 29). I'll post a picture as soon as they fit!

I applaud everyone who is completely happy in their own skin and happy with what they have; I wish I had the courage to be this way. Unfortunately, I need to be the size 4 or 6 not the 10 or 12.

2 comments:

Brooke said...

okay so i probably shouldn't admit that i'm reading this while eating a snickers bar.

but you hit on the balance i'm having trouble finding. i don't want to be healthy, but i also don't want to be obsessive.

valley view farm said...

yeah, good post. I just realized I have gained almost 5 lbs over the past month!!! Holy crap, me?? Maybe it was that cake I made last week and ate myself, oh, I think Ryan had a piece too.

I agree with the 30 part. How did I put on that weight so fast? Its only 5 pounds, but what will another month bring? Time to get back to healthy eating. And to exercising when I can fit that in!

Im joining you in the 'maybe Im not so happy with a little extra weight'. I've got a pair of pants I would like to fit as well. Lets do it!